Should You Split the Bill with Your Girlfriend or Boyfriend?

Navigating financial dos and don'ts when dating can be very difficult. Expectations as to who should pay for what change as time goes on. In the initial stages of a relationship, 38% of people said that both people should split things evenly.

This is particularly the case with the millennial and Gen Z generation, which both came in at 41%. Only 31% believe that the person who makes more money should pay for things. More males than females believe that the highest earner should pay, coming in at 39% with females trailing at 25%.

Why Do Men Believe that Expenses Should Be Covered by the Highest Earner?

When it comes to paying the bill, who should pay? Based on the stat above, men are far more likely to say that whoever makes more should split the bill like it's some form of bro code, but women tend to believe that things should be split evenly regardless. So what's the best answer?

A lot of this idea about men paying could come from the traditional or archaic idea that men should be the breadwinners in the family and therefore should contribute more... but it's 2024 - times have long changed from this and below, you'll see what this means.

The Younger Generation Sees Things Differently

When you look at the younger generation, more and more women are now reaching for the bill. Societal norms are changing. 80% of people think that it is more acceptable for a woman to earn more than their male partner. Not sure who the other 20% are, but they probably have a hard time living in 2024.

77% of people think that relationships don't even need a breadwinner anymore. Half and half!

Surveys have also found that younger generations are much more likely to feel like the costs should be split regardless of gender. With women earning more than before, and taking on more executive roles, great strides have been made when it comes to evening the power balance. It's evident to see too, in the generational differences.

People today value different things. 42% of Americans rank financial security as being one of the most attractive traits when looking for a partner. People and younger generations in particular want to be in control of their lives and this includes finances. Those who are aged 18-25 are much more comfortable discussing their finances when compared to someone who is over the age of 77.

When Should You Have the Money Talk?

Surveys have found that women tend to discuss money around 5 months into a relationship. This is before the average time that people say "I love you". While every single relationship is different, the sooner you talk about money, the better.

Having conversations about how you would like to approach finances allows the relationship to start on a transparent footing. One person in the relationship won't end up paying for everything and this can eliminate a power dynamic. Discuss finances as soon as you feel comfortable, as this will help you to ensure that you and your partner are financially compatible.

Who Should Pay for What?

One of the topics you may talk about would be who should pay for what. Everyone is in a different situation at the end of the day, so it's important to have conversations about this.

While you can say that one person is going to pay the bill one time, and the other will cover it the next, it's important to know that this can cause issues. If a meal is more expensive one time then this can stop the other person from wanting to order as much if they are on a lower income, etc.

One way that you can work around this would be for you to say that every bill is split down the middle. You can also split the bill by earning percentage. When you do this, you will work out who owns more and then divide the bill accordingly. If one person owns 20% more then they will cover 20% more of the bill. This helps to create the perfect balance when navigating a new relationship.

Of course, over time, doing this can become cumbersome. If you want to do something about this then one thing you can do is set up a joint account. When you set up a joint account, you can then pay both wages into the single account and then pay your bills from there. By doing this, you can make sure that the bills are always covered fairly and that one person is never paying more.

Where Should You Have the Money Conversation?

If you want to have a money conversation then one of the best things you can do would be for you to sit down with your loved one at a restaurant. Choose your favorite place to dine out as a couple and then trial splitting the bill there. By choosing your favorite place as a couple, you can avoid any awkwardness regarding steep prices or unexpected bills. You can also have it at home. Cook your favorite meal and then make a plan to talk about your finances.

It's important to make sure that you are both on the same page and that you bring up the conversation ahead of time. That way you know if your partner is even open to having it at all. If they aren't then you will need to do a bit more work or reassess your relationship because if you don't then you may find that things end up grinding to a halt and that you are not able to move forward as a couple.

So splitting the bill doesn't have to be an awkward conversation and it doesn't have to fill both parties with anxiety either. If you want to make sure that you are both happy then the only way to do this would be for you to talk it out. Sit down with your partner and ask them about the way they feel and also make sure that you give some thought to their financial situation. Avoid having the conversation at times of financial hardship if possible as well, as this could add extra tension you don't need and it could influence the way that the conversation goes too.